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Opening to Intimacy

by Allen

Orgasmic Meditation has a way of breaking down barriers. For me, those barriers had been locked inside me for a long time. The practice itself, and the authenticity and vulnerability it requires, encouraged me to communicate in a way that I hadn’t thought was ever possible before, and it did it in a safe way because of the container. The entire structure of Orgasmic Meditation (OM), with its rules and timed sequences, the allotted times for sharing and describing what you see and experience, forced me into this space of pleasurable uncomfortableness.

I remember, at the beginning of my practice, sitting there with a woman’s genitals open and visible to me. Then, for the noticing step, I had to talk to that woman about her genitals in a neutral way. I don’t know if I have ever done that before! Certainly not from a place of authenticity.

The Practice of Orgasmic Meditation

The entire practice is designed to take me through my discomfort and embarrassment, my judgment and fear, to a place of complete and total acceptance. The first few times I OMed, this rarely happened. It took a while for me. Initially, I felt uncomfortable and vulnerable. But once I had done it over and over again, it began to break down the barriers, and eventually, I got past all the things that brought discomfort. 

Vulnerability and Communication

Orgasmic Meditation takes me to a raw, exposed place, and sometimes, because of that, there’s a kind of mutual ambivalence. You’re in it together, and the structure of the practice itself moves you both into a different space, which can then become a mutually enjoyable spot. The OM invites you to go from vulnerable and uncomfortable into an expressive, warm, comfortable, inviting bubble where you both can be totally open. The practice gives us a method to communicate with each other in a way that we wouldn’t normally.

It’s like taking yourself out of the space of the world and into this private bubble that’s protected from everything else. In the nest, for me, time becomes malleable. Sometimes, it seems to stop. Sometimes it seems to speed up. Sometimes, it varies so much that the 15 minutes seem taken out of time altogether. In the container, everything is more intense. Colors are enhanced. Sounds are more nuanced. The experience is just more vibrant than everyday life.

Synchronicity with Nature

I remember this one particular Orgasmic Meditation session I had where it seemed like we were separate from the whole rest of the world, just us and nature. All these big, beautiful trees surrounded us, and cows and sheep were in the distance. When we OMed, it all merged—nature, the world, and us. For just that short period of time, we synced up together so extremely well—it was indescribable.

Authentic Communication

For me, Orgasmic Meditation has been a kind of gradual individual opening—an emotional, physical, and spiritual opening that is difficult to put into the right words. It opened me up and made me available to experience another level of communication. It brought up all the issues that normally kept me from intimate connection and intimate expression and revealed my true self. It helped me move past old limiting programs and fears and continues to support my ability to communicate authentically with other people. It opened the door to a new way of relating to myself and my life.

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