Eros Platform logo

My Finger Stroked by Itself

by Dennis

I was very small as a kid, which made me a target for bullies, and I became extremely shy. I didn't have many friends. Because I went to an all-boys Catholic high school, there were few opportunities to talk to girls or ask them out.

Career and Marriage Struggles

The college began just as computers became accessible, and I discovered a talent for programming. At the end of my first year, I started working as a programmer for a small, privately owned elementary school. I had a few friends, three guys, whom I would meet up with to do computer stuff or go bowling. That was basically the extent of my social life.

I didn't have my first real girlfriend until I was 25. I was a virgin, and we never really had intercourse. But I finally got married and have two kids. My wife converted to Catholicism and gradually became a serious Catholic, while I became an atheist, so we drifted apart. 

After ten years of working at a school, I lost my job and couldn't find work in the computer field. I had learned American Sign Language in college, so I became an interpreter for deaf kids for a while. I worked as a bank teller, and then I did data entry. Towards the end of the marriage, I was unemployed for six years, which contributed to our breakup. 

While the divorce was pending, I slept in her garage for about a year, looking for a place to move. It was Palm Sunday when she got tired of having me there. She drove me to church and didn't drive me home. For the first time in my life, I was on my own. I slept at a shelter for a few months and then moved into subsidized, single-resident occupancy or SRO housing in a converted hotel.

Discovering Orgasmic Meditation

One day, I came across information about Orgasmic Meditation. I thought OM might allow me to create intimacy in my life. 

I met with a group of people who all practiced Orgasmic Meditation (OM), and someone asked me to OM. I don't remember feeling anything in particular during my first OM, but I enjoyed it and knew I wanted to do it again. But I didn't see how I would get up the nerve to ask anyone.

Over time, the asking got easier. One of the rules is that when a person asks for an OM, if the other person says no, then “no” is a complete sentence. No explanation is needed. It means that they don't want to at that particular time, but you can always ask again, and maybe some other time, they'll say yes. I learned not to take it personally and not to see it as a rejection, and that made it easier to ask for OMs.

Growing Confidence with OM

The day my divorce decree was signed, I had a memorable OM. I found a really high-sensation spot on the strokee's clitoris, and she almost got to a point where she couldn't take it; it was so much sensation. That was the most powerful moment of any OM I can recall.

When I was in college, we had a video game called “Centipede” in the cafeteria. After a while, I got so good that sometimes I felt as if my hands were playing the game, and I was standing there watching it. I had a couple of OMs like that, where it seemed my finger was stroking all by itself, and I was just a spectator.

My confidence in the practice gradually increased. As stroking became more familiar, I didn't have to think about it so much, and I knew the different steps of the container. It also became easier to have conversations with people about the Orgasmic Meditation practice.

I was hired as a front desk clerk at the building where I live to buzz people in from outside, deliver packages, and keep an eye on the lobby. My commute is three flights of stairs. I get to chat and joke with people who come and go. Life is better.

Related Stories
From Digital Isolation to Taking Risks in Life
by Nathanael Horton
I like to say that my life started at age 30. You’ll see why. I come from a unique background. My mother is from the highlands... see more
4 min Read
From Empty to Filled
by Dan
Practicing Orgasmic Meditation With Multiple Partners Transformed My Approach To Relationships And Sex. see more
4 min Read
Connection and Solitude
by Felix
Through OM, I Discovered A Deeper Connection With Myself And Others, Transforming My Experience Of Solitude And Relationships. see more
5 min Read
Rediscovering Trust and Connection
by Dan
Orgasmic Meditation Helped Me Process Suppressed Feelings From My Divorce And Find Emotional Healing And Growth. see more
6 min Read
A Mutual Safe Space
by Jon
Through The Practice Of Orgasmic Meditation, I've Learned To Trust My Intuition More, Allowing Me To Provide Better Patient Care. see more
3 min Read
I Asked, And It Happened
by Jill
I Found A New Perspective On Sexuality Through Orgasmic Meditation, Where Men Genuinely Want To Offer And Resonate With Women. see more
4 min Read
A Deeper Comfort With Who I Am
by Nate Leon
I Feel Seen And Appreciated For The First Time In My Life, Surrounded By Great People Who Truly Value Me. OM Changed Everything. see more
4 min Read
My Restless Leg Syndrome Became Manageable
by Ed Maran
I first heard of Orgasmic Meditation (OM) through my girlfriend. When she asked me if I would be interested in learning the pra... see more
4 min Read