When we enter the Erotic body, we touch a state of optionality and see, from a different vantage point, the inevitable simultaneity of repulsion and attraction. The issue isn’t that these two qualities exist simultaneously, for this dynamic tension is what we call life. Instead, now we have allowed consciousness to be immersed in the spacious container of the body, which can concurrently hold and expand to include both qualities—repulsion and attraction— rather than regard them as polarized. It all depends on whether or not the tools are in the hands of the tumescent mind, which operates with the mantra “separate and oppose” and positions the two forces of repulsion and attraction against each other, offering attention to only one at a time. In contrast, the Erotic mind aims to expand and include. But the tumescent mind sets up a tug-of-war between repulsion and attraction, where their natural, dynamic tension becomes tension—and tension alone. A kind of fixity emerges that locks the ability of either of these forces, repulsion or attraction, to effectively move us. We are confined to a cell, using these two forces as weapons of defense for the likes and dislikes that make up our identity in a paralyzing state of seeming contradiction.
When, on the other hand, these forces are in the hands of the Erotic mind, they operate for an altogether different purpose, moving us through the world not according to our preferences, but beyond them, into the complete maturation of being. The aim is to draw the two seemingly opposing forces into the concept of self as a means of knowing the self in unification, including knowing our own uniqueness. It is when we are pulled down into the Erotic realm, outside of the watchful eye of the “command and control” center of the tumescent mind—which uses attraction and repulsion to maintain a locked sense of self—that we have the potential to go beyond our most cherished convictions. This potential to go beyond, when pulled down into the Erotic realm, incites an internal revolution that evolves beyond the “old guard” dictatorship. This force takes us beyond our own resistance and into the heart of our humanity, where we reclaim what we have deemed unacceptable in ourselves as well as what we have been unwilling to own and love. Reassigned from protecting a small identity, this force now appropriates attraction and repulsion, guiding the lower realms toward or away from anything depending on how it aligns with the Erotic self. These tendencies are in no way bad, but have been used by an unconscious and unskillful driver.
In OM, with the Erotic self as driver, we begin to practice the skill of pendulation. This involves weaving together seemingly opposing states. Rather than trying to maintain a pristine state alongside a profane state, we expand our reception to include both states. OM tells us that all we seek is here, right now in this very stroke, and the only thing missing is the capacity to receive it. Pendulation relieves us of the internal conflict that arises when we abandon one aspect of ourselves in favor of another. The way we do this kind of pendulation is simple. We locate our home spot, the spot we often gravitate toward, because it’s where we feel solid and secure. It may be the one o’clock spot, or at a more advanced level we may have found our own unique spot. We then locate a spot that repulses us. It may have a more pleasurable quality, which we see ourselves as too “spiritual” for. It may have the “in love” quality, which we turn away from because we often get stuck there. It may be a spot that is too subtle and that we find irritating. If a spot has been switched off, it can even appear “dead.” We stroke the home spot until it is well lit with a kind of valence around the spot that radiates outward. Next we move to the repulsion spot, almost as if we are dragging Eros from one spot to the other. We refer to this as “turning on the spot.” Pendulation teaches us to recognize that every spot is uniquely beautiful, with each spot offering something vital to the whole. If the whole is not lit up, we rely overly on the spots that are lit up. If our twelve o’clock spot is turned on but our six o’clock spot is not, we will have liftoff even when we need gravity. The twelve o’clock spot will become overtaxed and our response will not be on the spot of what wants to happen. In order to light up the whole clitoris, we pendulate until the two spots are connected. It is as if we are hooking into a power source to bring electricity to another spot, until this other spot is itself switched on and capable of self-generating power. We do this until all the spots on the clitoris are connected and lit up. At this point there is a phase transition and the whole clitoris switches on. The clitoris becomes a source that pumps Eros into the body, until the sensation spreads to the whole of the body. From here, we pendulate in terms of our speed. We may have a preference for a rapid speed and tend to check out when the stroking is slow. In that case, we alternate between fast and slow strokes until the ignition from one transfers to the other. We then move to pressure, going through and igniting all three pressures (heavy, medium, and light) on all spots. Finally, we include directions (upstrokes and downstrokes) until every spot is equally ignited at all speeds, all pressures, and in both directions. We have now liberated the clitoris and, by extension, the body. Instead of having the ability to merely move, the body now has the option to be moved according to the commands of the fully immersed Erotic self. Then the consciousness beyond consciousness we call genius is able to move us into the deeper truth of the calling on each of us, without impediment. This is where we have the courage to not be defined by an identity rooted in culture, but to define a culture that goes beyond our separate identity, all while protecting the sanctity of our unique expression. Just as each spot on the clitoris has a unique offering that is of the most benefit only when the whole is lit up, so too is our expression in this life.
