Medium pressure is used for several purposes, including to find a basic connection between partners, to find a spot to integrate a high or low peak, or to ground and comfort in a general way. Medium pressure is the equivalent to a bath that is body temperature. The aim is to have the finger feel so fluid and buttery that it melts into the spot and there is a simple, calming connection. The bread-and-butter stroke—the stroke we return to in order to integrate—uses medium pressure and medium speed.
Each strokee has a slightly different internal setting for what medium is, but for the most part it’s a slight indentation in the skin that registers as a tiny amount of friction—just enough to stir up an electromagnetic sensation. Don’t be afraid to go to medium pressure at any point. Many strokers have a tendency to want to get fancy with big, looping ups and crescendos down, but it’s possible to have an OM life entirely composed of medium pressure and experience the opening and connection to the Erotic mind. That opening and connection is the only purpose.
The Erotic mind will take us where it and we want to go, while fanciful strokes are often an impediment. There is nothing that is more exalted, spectacular, or awe-inspiring than being present in the moment with this stroke, right now. It doesn’t matter whether we bang on the door to the Erotic mind or gently tap it; all that matters is that it opens. The glory is found in what happens when the door opens, and when it opens, our finger will be guided beyond what we could ever have consciously thought to do.
On this side of the door, the key is to do whatever we do well, diligently guided by sensation and avoiding adding anything extra. What makes us feel good about ourselves on this side proves to be empty on the other side. We must not fall into the trap of thinking we can perform the inexpressible joy and freedom that happens in the Erotic mind when it moves our hand for us: the mind is elevated to see things it has never seen, through a body that feels things it has never felt.
The mind requires more work on the front end to find the skill, precision, and interest in the simple, medium-pressure stroke—to find an entire world in what could seem boring or repetitive, coming back to refresh our attention every time. This, though, is how we turn the mundane into the magical. We have no need to create spectacular conditions; instead, we train the mind to find the obedience it needs to see the spectacular in the mundane.
With medium-pressure strokes, we need to pay attention to whether we are being overly cautious and using them to avoid venturing into other pressures or using them to maintain a sense of comfort rather than to create growth. And with medium speed, we can be lulled into a complacency where we aren’t growing because we aren’t feeling the fear of the unknown. In those scenarios, we may become stuck in this pocket and, invariably, we receive diminishing returns. Soon, we are only stroking for superficial or physical pleasure, and the element of Eros that gives Orgasmic Meditation dimension and complexity is lost. When this happens we are no longer OMing—we are merely stroking genitals.
The antidote is to return to listening, at the point of contact, to what is being asked for. It’s quite simple because it’s always changing. It can take a moment to recognize the only thing that brings gratification is growth, but the moment we tap back into the point of contact, we remember.
